This is my book report and my book report is bout dinosaurs. My ‘nother teacher what we had before Mrs. Majellan said that you can’t do a book report bout dinosaurs cos dinosaurs aren’t books but then I was like “but dinosaurs are IN books and everyone does a stupid book report and no one ever reviews dinosaurs.” Then she started crying and mum says it’s probably cos her husband left her for another man but then my dad said ‘SHUT UP HELEN!’ and then my mum said ‘Don’t tell me to shut up in front of our boy!’ and Dad said she was a stupid cow and then the TV volume got really loud so I went to my room and wrote my book report bout dinosaurs and now you are reading it.
Once upon a time, dinosaurs were super cool and rad. They used to just go and eat each other FOR NO REASON! The T-rex would be all like:
“Hey Triceratops! I don’t like your face so I’m going to bite it with my teeth!”
And then the triceratops would be like:
“Dude, you have tiny hands. Are you ‘tarded or something?” And then they’d fight and there would be totally rad guitar solos like ‘meedley medley medley meee meee waaaaaaah!’
And that was all totally radstyles.
Then one day God threw a big rock at the earth ‘cept some people say it wasn’t god just science but mum says they are heathens. I don’t know what science was doing throwing rocks but whatever it made everything all cold like when I put dad’s iPhone in the freezer cos I wanted to cryomagenically freeze it for people in the future so they could use it to call me and tell me what happens in Ben Ten when he’s grown up.
Then all the dinosaurs were totally lame and just died and none of them ate each other’s faces or nuthin and then there was wolly mammoths which were kinda cool but not really. You could just stick a big wig on an elephant and it would be a woollymammoth cept kinda like a girl.
So now we have crocodiles and junk but no more dinosaurs and no one ever gets to have them for pets or ride them to school or command them to eat Mr. Kinsworth when he be’s mean to me just cos I left my fudgicicle on his desk or whatever.
n conclusion, dinosaurs were the raddest but then they just died so now I just like TV. I give them three stars.